Were we always this divided? Are party line splits causing intense disagreement on every basic political issue in the U.S.? Is this why some of our founding fathers distrusted the idea of having political parties for the sake of our nation in the first place? Although there are no clear answers to these questions, there may be a way to reduce polarization in day-to-day discussions to mitigate bias and preconceptions. Political issues are rarely black-and-white; they require perspective. In fact, reports suggest that Americans are more emotionally polarized than ideologically polarized. Whether it’s family, friends, or colleagues, it is essential to recognize that we likely share more common ground than we think.
To Engage or Not to Engage
The strain that comes with speaking to those with different political values than our own makes sense when considering the mental toll these relationships can take. However, avoiding topics altogether or simply repeating misinformation and refusing in-depth conversation can lead to even more tension. Even for those who try to avoid expressing an opinion on a political topic, dodging a conversation can be perceived as complicity. Having no opinion to share is still an action with its own consequences. Because of this, sometimes having cross-party conversations can be more beneficial than we think.
However, at other points, it makes sense to set boundaries in relationships concerning the topics you will discuss and the language you will tolerate. In today’s climate, it is hard to find an issue that is not politicized, which only increases the importance of shutting down a conversation when it is clear neither party will get anything out of it.
Keep Your Composure and Dig
If tasked with tackling discourse in a political conversation, it is important to make sure that there are grounds for understanding whether a conversation is productive. Can both parties allow each other to be listened to and discuss with genuine intentions? This is where active listening is crucial. Even if you disagree, allowing the other party to express their thought process and what they believe they know is crucial to making them feel heard. This allows a conversation to take place without escalation. Although this may lead you to want to immediately debunk the information being shared, remember that information repeated is often simply information that has been spewed over and over again. A lot of pre-formulated conclusions are harder to change, and escalation certainly will not change minds. Enter all conversations with the goal of listening to understand, not listening to respond. While it’s unlikely to change someone’s mind from one conversation, if your interlocutor feels respected, they might be more likely to at least consider your point of view.
Adding a Personal Element
Considering that you are likely conversing with someone you know, it may be effective to share how close issues are to you on a personal level. Not only does this add perspective, but it is also something different from listening to statistics and arguments presented one after the other. It also keeps us from villainizing one another or turning impacted populations into dehumanized statistics. Everyone has their own stories, and listening to one another is a way to humanize each other and to connect..
Important Reminders
Remember, having a dialogue is the most crucial aspect of engaging in these types of conversations. While it can feel frustrating to walk away from a conversation without changing someone’s mind, dialogue itself is a core tenant of democracy. Having these conversations is difficult, but it is also a form of engagement, power, and community! If we can lean into uncomfortability, recognize what productive conversation looks like, and listen to understand, we might begin to build bridges and rekindle respect one conversation at a time.